MIDLIFE SEX ED

PNW

47

Did you know that after a total hysterectomy (surgical removal of the entire uterus and the cervix) some women can actually feel that empty space in their lower abdomen where the organs once lived? —Because I did not. And it freaked me the f**k out.

My genetic profile was so bad that even my HMO felt it prudent to pay for my hysterectomy rather than incur the probable cancer-related costs. This perk, however, still took a few years of advocacy which felt familiar for this latchkey girl who got a house key at age10 and was sent out into the wild each summer day before there were farm-to-table cooking camps available. The empty space in my gut felt poignant. I was grateful to have the medical care to avoid these particular cancers, as well as to have stopped the weeks and weeks of perimenopausal bleeding and debilitating migraines.

Yet also, I couldn't help but feel the sadness that came with being labeled an instant old lady. I'd never considered it, but was I now in the "barren and sexually irrelevant" category? ...Where did this shame come from? It came from the same puritanical hypocrisy that can't handle the existence of trans folx and also asks for thoughts and prayers when a certain political figure's partner enjoys exploring their s3xuality. It came from the flooding of both sexual objectification and fear based s3x education.

We need to patchwork together accurate s3xual education in our peri-post menopausal experience and we will. You know what's punk? —Caring for everyone. Gex X is awesome because we LOVE HARD and also do take no one's sh*t.